Monday, January 27, 2014

Deep Freeze 2014 Yell Free Year Challenge

           Here is Minnesota we are in the middle of a deep freeze!! It has been so terrible cold the past month. Like -50 degree wind chills and sub zero room temps for DAYS! So with it being so cold and us being sick and Jess having surgery last week, we've been stuck inside a  lot. This makes the challenge way more challenging! Keeping a preschooler and a toddler inside the house without loosing your mind is HARD! Jess was home last week so that helped a little, but he was in some pain and was not able to be as physical with the kids as they like him to be.
           Our win from last week is how well we all did while Jess was having his surgery. He needed a driver to be there and we didn't have anyone to watch the kids, so we all went! The kids did very well in the waiting room and I am very proud that I didn't once yell. It was a bit stressful trying to keep them from destroying the waiting room, but they managed to charm the receptionists and have a little fun.
           We continue to struggle with the kids fighting and being aggressive with each other and just plain not listening. Jess seems to have hard time with Lance not listening and they had a rough time on Saturday. Lance was running around and Jess was trying to vacuum. I was asking Lance to stop and Jess got very upset and yelled which made Lance cry. It was a rough time because I got upset too. After everyone calmed, Lance apologized and Jess half assed said sorry too. I'm trying very hard to get Jess on board with the challenge and he acts like he agrees, but then he yells and acts like he didn't do anything wrong. I guess I need to make more of an effort to include Jess in why we are practicing positive parenting. He was raised in a family where mom and dad are the boss and kid do as they're told no questions asked. It is hard to move away from what you grew up with.
            My goal for this week to to get Jess more on board and work on not repeating the past.

Monday, January 20, 2014

Yell Free Challenge, sick days :(

For the last week or so we have all been battling a cold bug in some way or another. This has made it a rather difficult challenge to stay calm and not yell. When Mom and Dad are not feeling well and kids are fine it is a special kind of challenge! Jess and I both started feeling bad on Monday and Lance seemed to catch it on Tuesday. Because he was not feeling well, Lance seemed to have a harder time not lashing out and we had a lot of hitting and pushing and crying this week. Kenna is not sleeping at night either, so I was sick and exhausted! She seems to have caught the bug now so that presents another challenge for us this week. Jess is having oral surgery this week and will be home with us Tuesday-Thursday. Last week was very hard, but I am not giving up! I may have yelled a lot more then I like but I am trying very hard!

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Week 3 Yell free

Last week, Thursday and Friday were tough days in our house, but we managed to make it through. My period started on Friday and that has a severe affect on my moods. I yelled, a lot. This weekend was fun though. We went to the trampoline park and the kids had a great time. There was very little conflict. Now this week is starting out a little rough as well because Jess and I both caught some bug and it looks like Lance might have it too. So Monday and Tuesday have been stay at home days and those are always harder then days when we get out. Hopefully the bug is a fast moving one and we are all back to good health soon.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Yell Free Year week 2

This weekend went really well for my no yelling! Not so well for Jess. I told him about the challenge and he agrees that it is a good idea, but he has a hard time not yelling. He definitely has a hard time keeping his cool when Lance does anything to hurt Kenna. I struggle with this a lot as well. Right now the weather is so cold that leaving the house is not recommended so the kids are having to be stuck inside at home, which makes for a hard time not going nuts! Kenna is teething pretty badly and not sleeping much so that also contributes to the crazy in our house. She has started throwing little tantrums and biting in retaliation for Lance's aggression or even just randomly. I think it might be related to her teeth coming in. I find that I have a hard time not yelling when I'm in pain, so when Lance hits or kicks me or Kenna bites I have to try very hard to keep my voice calm and speak respectfully to them. I am also in quite a bit of pain from plantar faciitis right now and I know that is not helping me. I hope to have the pain under control soon and to be able to get back to working out. I know for sure that working out really helps me stay calmer with the kids. The physical activity I get is great, and the break from being "mommy" for a hour or so is very refreshing! I love that the kids get to play and run around in the Rainbow Room at the Y!
In other news, Lance might finally actually be potty trained!! He did really well this weekend and was in undies all weekend. He did have an accident Sunday night at Granny P's, but I think it was mostly because he was so busy he forgot to go. With him finally getting into undies full time I need to start looking for a preschool for him. Yeah! We used going to school as a "motivator" to help with the potty training so I want to find a good fit for him that he can start soon. I'm looking into a couple "christian based" ones and the local public preschool is also an option. I am also considering a Montessori school. I'm really looking forward to him going to school as I think he will thrive on the social interaction and I will have time to be with just Kenna for a few hours a week.

Friday, January 3, 2014

Yell-Free Year Challenge

This year I've decided to take the Yell Free Year Challenge by Positive Parents! I started yesterday and did really well, but today has been more of a challenge. I want to be a better mom and stop shouting at the kids. My main triggers are: exhaustion, violence (when L hurts K mostly), and being ignored. I am working on helping myself not react to these. Here's the link to the challenge: http://www.positive-parents.org/2013/11/the-yell-free-year-challenge.html

I'm going to try to document my struggles/successes here. Today's struggles: Lance freaking out because he wants more screen time, and K sticking her hand in her poop. Today's successes: Getting through breakfast and lunch without raising my voice (these kids are messy!) and not yelling at Lance when he was too rough with K.